In his recent Mashable post, Soren Gordhamer highlights “5 Social Media Lessons from Whole Foods”, and starts off by proclaiming that they have “impressively embraced social media more than most”. As evidence, he points out that they’ve amassed more than 1.2 million Twitter followers and more than 123,000 fans on Facebook…. which brings me to the point of this short entry/rant. Why does there seem to be this pervasive confusion that social media celebrity and social media competence are one in the same?

Time to change the logo?

Allow me to explain… imagine you were invited to a cocktail party hosted in the Rose Garden by Barack Obama and the first family. And imagine this party was attended by society’s elite, including business and world leaders from across the globe. Now imagine you were asked to attend and were very excited by the idea that you’d get to shake hands with the world’s most powerful people, and that you were determined to make a good first impression that would have lasting positive implications for your business and personal lives. So, this being the case, which of these scenarios would demonstrated a higher level of social intelligence?:

a. You show up looking (and smelling) drunk and disheveled, boorishly fawn over the female guests while mumbling inappropriate commentary about Mrs. Biden’s cleavage, wind up dancing on the tables and finish the evening by skinny dipping in the Reflecting Pool. You’ve been thrown out with everyone watching, and they all know who you are.

b. You show up dressed impeccably, wowing the guests with your charm, wit and manners. You discreetly mention your occupation, but only when asked, and promise to follow up, but only when asked. You leave having engaged meaningfully with only 20% of the guest. Each of which, however, has a lasting positive impression of you, and is now formally an acquaintance.

Similarly, which of a or b would create greater celebrity for yourself?  I think we all know the answer to that…

So, back to Whole Foods then. Perhaps they’ve done a decent job of achieving social media celebrity, and indeed they have cottoned onto something substantial in the concept of organic, unprocessed food, but I personally feel that saying their use of social media is impressive is grossly inaccurate. Why? Because, quite simply, it’s SOCIAL media and not social MEDIA, and being impressive in one’s use of it requires that one is impressive when it comes to one’s social IQ… something Whole Foods is decidedly not, starting at the top.

Social Media Faux Pas  #1: Lying about who you are

Social Dummy?

Back in 2005, the a series of posts bashing retailer Wild Oats appeared on a Yahoo! Forums board under the name Rahodeb. “Would Whole Foods buy OATS? Almost surely not at current prices. What would they gain? OATS locations are too small.” Rahodeb speculated that Wild Oats eventually would be sold after sliding into bankruptcy or when its stock fell below $5. A month later, Rahodeb wrote that Wild Oats management “clearly doesn’t know what it is doing. . . . OATS has no value and no future.” Thing is… Rohodeb was actually John Mackey, Whole Foods CEO. Uncool… very uncool. And when challenged, this was his response:

“I posted on Yahoo! under a pseudonym because I had fun doing it. Many people post on bulletin boards using pseudonyms.” He said that “I never intended any of those postings to be identified with me.” “The views articulated by rahodeb sometimes represent what I actually believed and sometimes they didn’t. Sometimes I simply played ‘devil’s advocate’ for the sheer fun of arguing. Anyone who knows me realizes that I frequently do this in person, too.

Social Media Faux Pas #2: Publicly Shunning Your Primary Segment

On August 12th, 2009 John Mackey wrote a Wall Street Journal editorial quoting Margaret Thatcher and suggesting that healthcare is a commodity that only the rich, like him, deserve. In retaliation, the very community Mackey has been relying on to pay his exorbitant prices even when they can’t really afford it,  established one of the fastest growing groups in Facebook history: “Boycott Whole Foods”. Last count: 34,213 members and growing… Again, not exactly a shining demonstration of a high social IQ.

So how do I account for the massive following Whole Foods have online if their social media strategy is crap? It’s simple… their success has nothing to do with social media or Whole Foods. It has to do with a population intent on overspending on food so that they can convince themselves they’re healthy. By co-opting the “we shop at Whole Foods” message, people are trying to tell a story about themselves to themselves (as Rob Walker would be proud of me saying ).

I’d love to hear about other examples of so-called experts confusing celebrity with competence. Please chime in with your thoughts….

-D

P.S. Trader Joe’s is the sh*t!